BRIDGE ACROSS FOREVER

Minsan pag tinotoyo ako ng mga tanong kong wala sa lugar kung maisip, itatanong ko yan kung sinong kasama ko..a few weeks ago, habang nagkkwentuhan kami ng isang kaibigan, habang kumakain ng pilsen, tinanong ko sya out of nowhere, "paano mo gusto mamatay?" Di ko alam anong brand ng toyo ko nun, pero wala naisip ko lang kasi, madalas ayaw pag usapan ng mga tao ang kamatayan, pero bet na bet pag usapan kung paano mabuhay.Hindi ba mas magandang pag usapan ang kamatayan, kasi ayun hindi mo mapag handaan eh, edi mas ok na alam ko kung paano mo bet mamatay! Parang ganto lang yan, gusto mo maging abogado, pero call center agent ka ngayon. you dont get what you want but you can aspire what you want to be when you grow up! Walang sense. oo na! Sabi kasi ng isang hindi ko kilala, "Life and Death are just two sides of the same coin". So bakit mo iisnabin ang isang pisngi ng piso mo kung isang buo mo naman yan ipinang babayad? Di ko alam kung ano anong lumalabas na analogy s...

Everyone craves to have that one perfect love..Who doesn't, right? I've talked to a lot of people, met a lot of earthlings, and observed the metro go round, (in my several bouts of coffee-ing and counting human beings session by myself) I feel like they, we exert so much effort, just to get to that #relationshipgoals they can post in the social networking sites. What has come to our dear romantic side? Is it just within the confines of our social sites that we can see happy couples, sweet gestures, genuine kilig, guys making ligaw sa bahay of the ate, and making sibak the kahoy for the ate's family (not the ate ang sisibakin). Kidding aside, I dont know when was the turning point of humanity, to be so digital about everything, including love and ligawan portion. Personally, before, I wasn't really a fan of ligawan stage. Mainly because, if I know i like someone, I dont want the period wherein, the guy should prove something to the girl, because that would be so sex...

I was about to put down my doodle notebook, when I saw this piece on the next page of my doodles..Di ko sure kelan ko 'to sinulat, pero feeling ko around June to..nung wala akong magawa sa life kung hindi, mag mukmok bakit nya ako niloko.hahaha Eto sabi.. You make me doubt our love, you make my heart scared of tomorrow. Am I really the one you love? Or will she be the one you'd find tomorrow? We were as close as a hundred percent zoom true love, but, with all the things you're telling me now, we might be as far as all particles of big bang tomorrow. With all these turn of events, suddenly, I imagined a lonely tomorrow..without you, without me, without us. ....end

dahil im pms-ing,I got gazillion cravings and emote episodes the whoooole weekend, I was able to start writing my project script! I got characters already, the story line, the twists and turns but no ending yet..also,I kinda feel discontented with the introduction I did, I was so depressed last night, I wasn't able to incorporate humor! twas supposed to be a rom-com shit, tas walang comedy! Kaabnormalan ko talaga kagabe. I was in my usual reading place, konti lang tao, peaceful. I enjoyed their playlist last night, very nature loving, tagalog kasi, pero hindi tipong Aegis ah! Basta! So yun nga, since I woke up andami kong thoughts na di ko malaman san ilalagay, tinatamad naman ako magsulat nung nagising ako..pero nung mag isa na ako ayan na syempre, wala naman na ako magagawa kasi kelangan ko na talaga isulat..kahit puro sadness lang naman..sinapian ata kasi ako kahapon, kaya eto na sila: so, literally, I was drowning with my own thoughts yesterday, I got so emotional, I cried...

Once I asked someone, do you know a time when you feel like the world around you is in deep slumber, and you enjoy the perception of being alone...sensing all there is to feel, the darkness before dawn, a peculiar moment of silence within twilight. Today seems one of those days, that I get flashbacks, of all the things that happened these past few weeks, months. I met someone, someone who unexpectedly made me feel alive again, someone whom I confided all the bizarre thoughts my brain can make up, and luckily this person listened. I'll paint a picture of him; he is  tall, fair-skinned, and he smells like none of the earthlings I ever smelled in my life. He has brown eyes, like chestnuts, which looked into my soul, like he knows more that I want to tell him. His lips that curves when he sees something amusing, his head that tilts sideways involuntarily when he's thinking, or maybe twas just one of his mannerisms. And his voice, god, his voice makes me feel I'm listening to...

Nung naisip ko isulat to, ang naisip kong title agad, "the art of being alone". Nag google ako, masyado nang madaming gumamit ng gantong title..masyado na atang madaming alone sa mundo. O aminin na natin sa ating mga mapagkailang budhi, na walang gusto maging mag-isa. Kaya habang tinititigan ko yung mga sa salitang "Post a title" sa me title box..bigla kong naisip ang science. Science..yung favorite mong subject nung grade 1..Ano nga ba ang kahulugan ng science? Kinunsulta ko ulit si google..eto ang pinaka gusto kong definition, at gusto kong gamitin sa kontekstong bet kong baybayin: "Science is the concerted human effort to understand, or to understand better, the history of the natural world and how the natural world works, with observable physical evidence as the basis of that understanding" Ano ibig sabihin nyan? Ewan ko.  Ang chika eh, ang siyensya o agham daw ay isang.. wait! disclaimer muna, ito ay ayon sa pagkakaintindi ng mura kong p...

minsan..ahm.kadalasan pala, pag nagbback read ako dito, napapak smh na lang ako.. Gusto ko sabihan yung sarili ko na wag na ako mag english.hahaha. :p

May isang kaibigan na nakausap ko paminsan, na nakapagpaalala sakin na gumagawa ako ng daily astrology nung high school palang ako.. hulog sya ng langit, since medyo nanunuyo na yung utak ko sa mga trip kong isulat nowadays..At least ngayon meron na akong pagppraktisan. Heniwey..ang mga horoscope na ginagawa ko naman noon eh walang katuturan, yung tipong wala naman talagang scientific basis..ay wala nga naman pala talaga yun, according lang yun daw sa mga galawan ng mga bituin sa kalangitan. Biruin mo nga naman, ang mga bituin na nangungusap at sasabihin na ang mga taong ipinanganak sa buwan ng Agosto ay may angking sayad na di kailanman mapapantayan ng iba, marapat na mag ingat sa araw na ito, dahil meron kang kaibigan na sasabutahe sa OOTD mo. Mga ganon kemerut, minsan naiisip ko kung ang mga horoscope sa mga tabloid ay kinukunsulta ba sa mga psychic or star readers..aba! ang hirap nun ah, gabi gabi kang titingala sa langit, para humingi ng kemerut sa mga bituin..ibig sabihin pala e...

By how far back did I actually go to make it to where I am right now? Did my past helped me move forward? Are the pain of yesterday made me a better lover? a better person?a better daughter? a better sister? will i be a good wife? am i going to be the best mother my kid will ever ask for? or am i going to grow old holding my laptop,typing broken words and skipping heartbeats? What would it take for someone to create the best song? does she/he needs the best person to make the best song? or does a song writer needs a broken heart , alcohol and weed? Can a happy soul bring out a happy offspring in this motherfucking planet? What are the odds that a random person now, would actually make a break up song for you in the future? Why does a heart the size of a fist, could beat strongly in the face of death? Are there souls seeking revenge? Are there lives intertwined just to be an accomplice of a plotted revenge? Will there be someone in this world, who will make you ...